Introduction

Heyyyyy guys!

I figured that I needed to feel cool and have an awesome blog. I will be cool. I will. I’m just waiting for chest hair. I will be cool.

Anyway, I am the proud owner of a blog. I added a picture for effect.

My first blog post. You see I could make it great and thereby set the standard for the rest of my blogs, or I could make this one rather sucky and have them become progressively awesome-er. Then every time you read my blog you’ll be like ‘Hey, this chick keeps getting BETTER!’ and I’ll be like ‘Hey look at me go!’

I could post about lesbians. But my friend already does that so beautifully.

I could create some sort of a photo blog thing, but this girl makes me look like an amateur.

I could try and be funny but you see, my sense of humour is a little sadistic.

For example:

The one time, this kid was walking with his bicycle next to him, and he tripped. He tripped and in one swift movement flew over his bike and did a face plant at my feet. My first reaction? “BAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!”

His parents looked at me with disapproval. The kid wasn’t too happy either. I was. It was the funniest thing I’d seen all day.

Another time – I was sitting on the deck at Willard Beach in Ballito. There were 3 kids, a brother (about 12) and sister (about 7) and one dude who seemed to be like one of those loners who just pick a friend and become an appendage for the rest of the holiday. I used to get a lot of those. For some reason I had this ability to attract the creepiest loners. The ones who follow you around and do everything you do but actually say NOTHING. Not even hello. Sometimes you aren’t even sure if they speak. But religiously, every day you would meet at the same place and carry on with your awesome kid stuff that you do, along with this mute friend. At the end of it all, you just leave, or he just leaves.

Now that I think about it, that is perfect. A temporary attachment who would share the same experiences, do what you do, like what you like. Company, a silent friendship, an understanding. And then when it’s done, it’s done. You leave, he leaves and no one is sad.

I am digressing slightly, so let me continue.

Ballito, on the deck. The 3 kids had found a rock, slightly higher than the sand bank itself. The boys decided to run and ramp themselves off of the rock, doing awesome spinning things and flips in the air before they hit the sand.

The girl, being a girl, said, “You think you’re cool?? WATCH THIS!!!!”

She ran. Her face painted with determination and willpower. Her expression screamed ‘I WILL be awesome’.

She ran from so far back that by the time she got to the rock she was tired. I sat up in my chair. I knew this was going to be good. She leaped from the rock, arms outstretched like Superman. And somehow, that’s exactly how she went down. I don’t know what happened between the rock and the sand, but her face hit the sand first.

My reaction?

“BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA *choke on my gum* BAAAHAHAHAHAHA *can’t breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHA *fall on floor*” 

I’m sure by now you get the picture? 

I will most likely spend the next 12 blogs trying to figure out what I’m blogging about.